Today, as I sat on my bed, I imagined what my life would be like if I had more money, more cars, more women, more love, more food, more of everything I've ever desired. But then I realized, that there are people poorer than I am, with fewer accessories that I have, with less joy than I hold,and in worse situations than I have been, yet still grateful and hopeful.
On a chilly day in November, driving home from work, ideas ran through my mind on how I could get richer, smarter, better snd continually wanting more, more and more, until suddenly a car swerved into my lane without realizing I was on her blindspot. As miniseconds ran by, I felt the world pause around me, and reflections of the past ran through my mind. With an unexplainable instinct, I managed to escape an accident. Instatly, my perceived reality of the world changed.
Still in shock, I had a flashback to a sunny sunday in Nigeria when I was thirteen. As I was driving back from church with my mother, an idiom written on a truck struck my eyes. It said, "I complained I had no shoes, until I saw someone without legs." I immediately showed my mother, and she replied, "Toye, you've got to be grateful for what you've got, because you never know what anyone else is going through."
So I asked myself, why did it take me so long to interprete my mother's sayings?Why did it have to occur when I almost had an accident? Why? Why didn't it happen when I lost my father or when I lost my best friend? I guess it happened for a purpose.
Upon returning home, images of the incident flashed through my mind, so I imagined how my life would have changed if I had gotten into an accident. First, I would have to come up with the money to repair my car, considering insurance does not pay for it, I would miss a big exam I had to take that week, I would lose money for not going to work, and mostly I might have lost my life. But then again, I realized that my life was still worth living, nothing had been lost, and I could have moved on with life like nothing ever happened.
However, I saw this as a sign from God to be thankful, not for the big promotions, lottery win, new car, new family, new job, but for the little things. The mere fact that our cells continually work relentlessly to make us alive is worth being thankful for. My abilityto choose what clothes to wear, and to find a soft spot on my pillow to lay my head counts for more than a blessing.
So, everyday, I wonder, how something so little could do something so big. Life is worth being appreciated. One might say that life is not fair. Truth be told, life sucks. However, when you give life another chance and open your heart towards your dream again, posterity would prove that dreams eventually become reality.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Monday, September 21, 2009
The result
It was difficult for me to log in, so I asked her to check it for me. Unfortunately, she had no time to waste, so she insisted on calling me back. As I waited for this career determining factor of my life, my heart beat increased as my blood vessels expanded and my pupils dilated. The time came, as my results were only a password away.
Wat! I shouted. PS proved optimistic but BS was a disappointment. My mindset met my verbal expectations. In spite of this upset, I knew I had to hope with every breath I had in order to achieve my goals. The truth is, I’m still mad at myself, but what can I do.
I’m disgusted by the things I can’t control. I’m mad at the challenges I have, unhappy with the realities of life around me, but I’m hopeful of posterity, I know things will get better. Right now, I just need a little time to strategize and clear my head.
Wat! I shouted. PS proved optimistic but BS was a disappointment. My mindset met my verbal expectations. In spite of this upset, I knew I had to hope with every breath I had in order to achieve my goals. The truth is, I’m still mad at myself, but what can I do.
I’m disgusted by the things I can’t control. I’m mad at the challenges I have, unhappy with the realities of life around me, but I’m hopeful of posterity, I know things will get better. Right now, I just need a little time to strategize and clear my head.
Monday, August 3, 2009
The climaz
t was 5am in the morning when I woke up. I was sleeping half naked in my room. As I opened my eyes in darkness, my pupils dialated and my eyes continued to form the "yellow" eyes that confirms that an individual has lived in Nigeria before.
At 7am, I saw my neighbor, who complained of the same problem. He had almost choked to death in the middle of the night due to the same problem, lack of electricity.
We have all joked, talked and argued about it for decades. Promises were made in the past, yet unfulfilled. It is evident that Nigerians in general have failed lost hope in the government, as they campaign on the same lies with the motive of cashing your and my check in their account.
This has gone for too long. The new Nigerian generation, both at home and in diaspora, are at the climax of our frustration.
For some reason, I see a revolution coming to Africa in the next decade. I see changes coming to Nigeria. People are yearning for change. It has never been so obvious. Professors have endulged their students to do more research on alternative energy, as the ecomomy is hoping for cost efficient ways to highly technological products in Nigeria.
At 7am, I saw my neighbor, who complained of the same problem. He had almost choked to death in the middle of the night due to the same problem, lack of electricity.
We have all joked, talked and argued about it for decades. Promises were made in the past, yet unfulfilled. It is evident that Nigerians in general have failed lost hope in the government, as they campaign on the same lies with the motive of cashing your and my check in their account.
This has gone for too long. The new Nigerian generation, both at home and in diaspora, are at the climax of our frustration.
For some reason, I see a revolution coming to Africa in the next decade. I see changes coming to Nigeria. People are yearning for change. It has never been so obvious. Professors have endulged their students to do more research on alternative energy, as the ecomomy is hoping for cost efficient ways to highly technological products in Nigeria.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Summer Journey
I am preparing for the MCAT. I guess I have the dream of getting above a 35 on this exam to get into my dream school. I know for the next six months, I would be taking different exams that would give me options in the real world.
I also need to take the FE/EIT exam, to become a licensed Engineering. I love engineering and medicine. I have a passion of connecting these two fields together.
Back to the MCAT,
I have taken two practice tests so far, but I do not like my score, especially the verbal section. I know that I need to do this, and I know all I need is a little more dedication to get to my achievd goal. Lets see what the future holds!
I also need to take the FE/EIT exam, to become a licensed Engineering. I love engineering and medicine. I have a passion of connecting these two fields together.
Back to the MCAT,
I have taken two practice tests so far, but I do not like my score, especially the verbal section. I know that I need to do this, and I know all I need is a little more dedication to get to my achievd goal. Lets see what the future holds!
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